Today was actually a great day in the hospital. I feel like i’m starting to get on friendly terms with the other STs and i can joke around and be less shy around them. Plus, i’m learning so much at this hospital; way more than at the other one. All the doctors i’ve worked with have been really friendly and willing to teach me (so far) and i’m still making mistakes, but i’m at least learning from them. 

The only downside is that my preceptor is practically always there and all he ever does is hover and point out things i already know. It’s, first of all, really hard to work when somebody is literally staring at you the whole time trying to nitpick every single thing you do. And secondly, the things he nitpicks, i already know and am about to do. 

He just has so little confidence in me that it’s irritating, but i’m doing a great job. It’s seriously really annoying when someone doesn’t trust you enough to think you can do the simplest of things. 

I’m just a student. I’m obviously going to make mistakes, but that’s how i can learn from them. Making remarks during surgery (which i’m supposed to be paying attention to) isn’t helping anyone and it’s just plain rude. 

But other than him, doing my clinicals at this hospital is going great. I don’t dread having to go there every morning. It just sucks having to wake up at 4am every morning.

Today, i saw my first vagina in person. It was the first case i had to do in the OR and it was a procedure that used a camera so i was just observing. Let me tell you something. Doctors aren’t kind to vaginas. They stretch that shit out like it’s nothing. It literally reminded me of The Mummy when he opens his mouth really wide and lets out a swarm of locusts. I swear i was like:

I’ve never been so grateful to be gay.

I finally scrubbed in two cases today! I was supposed to scrub on Monday, but that got pushed all the way to today, but it worked out ‘cause the cases i got weren’t difficult which was good since i hadn’t scrubbed in, like, 2 months. 

The first case literally took 5 minutes. A woman had a mass on her scalp so we removed it and sent it to pathology to see what it was. 

The second case was a bilateral inguinal hernia which is a hernia in both sides of the groin area. It took around 3 hours. But the tech i was with said i did a really good job for my first time :D I thought seeing the inside of bodies would be different in person than in videos, but it’s not that different. The inside of the body all looks like fat… But that might’ve been ‘cause this patient was especially fat. 

I don’t scrub again until Monday ‘cause i have class tomorrow, but now i don’t have nerves when it comes to it. Although i hear the doctor i’m going to be working with on Monday is really anal. And not in the good way.

All that yellow stuff is fat.

It’s gonna be awesome. Wanna know why it’s gonna be awesome? ‘Cause my awesome boyfriend is coming with me!! It’s actually a long story…

My parents reserved a room in the Circus, Circus hotel in Las Vegas weeks ago. We were all planning to go (three brothers too) this weekend, but my dad is still in the hospital, recovering from his appendectomy. He had a bad reaction to the anesthesia post-op so he’s been in terrible pain for the past two days. The anesthesia fucked up his intestines so he couldn’t digest food and that’s what was causing him pain, so they had to take out all the contents of his stomach through a tube via nose. I saw him today and he’s doing better, but he’s in no shape to be going to Las Vegas. 

They tried cancelling the reservation, but it was too close to the date that they wouldn’t let us. Now we had to go or that would have just been a waste of money so we thought of just sending my brothers (i, originally, wasn’t planning on going), but they can’t take the reservation unless they’re 21. So now i have to go to Vegas. That’s when i had the brilliant idea to invite Juan. 

I made sure it was cool with my brothers and i even had to “come out” to my littlest brother Chris (he’s 12). Apparently, he already knew i was gay and have a boyfriend so it wasn’t hard. So it was cool with him and my other brothers. But then i found out that they’re bringing their girlfriends too! 

There’s 7 of us in total who are making this trip to Vegas and sharing a hotel room. We’re bringing sleeping bags and shit. 

I’m pretty excited for this trip for a few reasons:

• My boyfriend is coming
• I go to Vegas practically every year, but this is the first time since i turned 21
• Parents aren’t going to be there (although it’s under sad circumstances, but my dad’s feeling better)

I’m psyched.

I guess he’s not feeling too well after the appendectomy. Another day in the hospital might do him some good ‘cause he works way too much. Some forced rest is a nice change of pace for him. He also gets 2 weeks off from work so yay for him. Hopefully, they don’t keep him there even longer ‘cause then i might start to worry.

My day started off pretty uneventful. I wake up as my mom’s getting ready for church and she tells me about how my dad was having stomach pain last night, so my brother drove him to the ER. Apparently, he had appendicitis so he had to have it removed today.

Meanwhile, my boyfriend decided to pay me a visit! He rode on the bus for almost 3 hours!! I have the sweetest boyfriend ever, like, no joke. It was really awesome and i had tons of fun and i already miss him. He had to go around 9 o’clock ‘cause my dad was getting out of surgery and my mom wanted us to visit. 

I’m just getting home from visiting my dad and he’s alright. He’s gotta stay the night and for most of tomorrow, but he should be fine by the time we go to Vegas this coming weekend.

Today turned out to be anything but uneventful. I’m pretty exhausted now, but i don’t wanna sleep until i know Juan made it back to his dorm safely. 

You know, those things they wrap around your arm in hospitals so they can take your blood pressure. When i was a kid, i always thought it was going to crush my arm until it fell off. Now, i kind of like the feeling. It hurts so good…

Well, it’s not really a field trip since we individually have to drive ourselves to east LA. I’m not sure what the point of it is, but the classes who have done it before say that it’s super lame.

Oh i never said how we took Easter baskets to sick children in hospitals on Friday! That was my good deed for the year :3

I’m about to head off for the hospital ‘cause i have an infusion today so i’ll probably be there for 3-4 hours. These are the times i wish i had a laptop, but i’m hoping they just knock me out.

After that i’m driving straight to UCI ‘cause it’s my friend’s birthday!! Pretty psyched to see him since the last time i saw him was the day our friend died and that wasn’t a very “How’ve things been with you?” sort of day.

So i don’t leave on that depressing thought now, i will put up a gif of Squidward kissing a pickle.

I was in my car and he was walking across the street and we both saw each other, but i had to turn and keep going. I was debating making a u-turn so i could see what he’s been up to but then i rememebered “oh right, i destroyed your life. you probably don’t wanna talk to me.” so i kept driving.

That would’ve been awkward….

When i was in the hospital last year, my friends brought me a book of Sudoku. Ever since then I’ve been obsessed with this amazing number puzzle! I downloaded it on my little brother’s itouch and i can’t stop playing it!! It’s so much fun and it makes you think and it makes me feel smarticle whenever i finish :3

They gave me Benadryl at my doctor’s appointment yesterday to knock me out. Then i took a pure MDMA capsule at night, but i don’t feel anything after an hour so i take a red lollipop. Still nothing.

My friend was rolling balls so it wasn’t the pills. The only conclusion i can come up with is that the Benadryl medication somehow negated the effects of mdma ‘causing me to have no roll at all.

So if you’re taking Benadryl, don’t take E. It’ll just be a waste of a pill.